Our (not so) secret blogging life

  • The Midnight Cup of Coffee

“The midnight cup of coffee” is an occasional article that usually includes news and interviews with and about my favorite authors, and some non-book related topics as well.

I wrote this article on tumblr today, but then I felt the need to share it with everyone here as well. Sorry about the duplicate content – though it might not be a problem given the fact that I post my reviews or partial reviews on GoodReads too, for example. Most of us do.

Do we hide our book blogs?

top-secret-ram

A while back I came across this blog post about book-bloggers and their ‘secret’ blogger-lives.
I’ll quote a paragraph only:

“It’s no offline secret that I have a book blog. I’ve never attempted to hide my blog from people, and to be honest, that never even crossed my mind. But I know that puts me in the minority, and that most bloggers I know are book blogging in secret”

Amber was then challenging people to tell at least to one person about their blogs, to be proud of their work and never ashamed. So, it made me think.. And my answer was:

I don’t usually talk much about the books I read or the blog I own just because it never comes up in conversations. I read YA and most people my age don’t, so I don’t feel the need to give them any memo regarding this (it is not like I share their hobbies either.. well, most probably).

But the people that count know about it, they might be my friends on GR, or follow my page on FB, know about some things on my blog. Some recommend me other books and they read some that I loved. I even received a personalised ‘ReadingAfterMidnight’ cup for my birthday this year, which was pretty cool and thoughtful.

And yes, there are even some that roll their eyes at my preference for YA books or make silly remarks, but I don’t give a damn about that as I don’t need their ‘permission’ and I read whatever makes me happy. End of story ;)

ram-cup

The truth is that when none of your friends share your passion for whatever you blog about, you might get to feel a bit lonely. We humans really like to brag about the things we care about, to share our interests with everyone, to make others feel the same happiness we experience. And we like to do those things with our close ones.

But that’s not always an option.

There are times when those things are precious to you, so precious that you keep them for yourself and for only the ones that would appreciate them.

And there are times when other people around you really don’t ‘get you’, simply don’t like the things you like. For example, in my case 21 of my (real life, day to day) friends follow my blog on Facebook (which is really enough), but do any of them read the books I like? Hmm, nope.. not quite. Probably only 3 or 4 and only some books, very few books. The others are just along for the ride.

So I do understand if you, like me, decide that sharing your passion with ALL your friends is not necessary at all, as it wouldn’t make any difference anyways.

But to be ashamed of what you are doing? Why should you?!

Back to the YA reading, because that’s what I do and that’s what I blog about, I don’t do it to impress people, or to have something to talk about with them, nor do I want them to do the same thing (and read the same books). I do it for myself, I read those books because it makes me feel good and I blog about them because I like to share my thoughts with other people, no matter if they are close friends, book-friends or perfect strangers.

It is true, it annoys the hell out of me when one gets that look that says: “ah, you wouldn’t know about that book or whatever ‘cause you read only those stupid books of yours” and I would smack them right in the head with the best YA book I own (by my standards) if it weren’t for the fact that the book means probably more to me than they do.

But then again I could read about quantum Physics and none of my friends would share that interest with me either, so we are back to square one..

Does it matter what others think?

Just think about it for a sec… Would you be ashamed if you would do “smart” things, read “smart” books that no one else does/reads anyways? (and what the hell is smart, come to think of it?)
No, but it would still feel uncomfortable in some way, right? You would be the geek then, the nerd *sigh* Did you ever feel like whatever you do someone will disagree at some point, no matter what? Because that’s true. And so, believe me when I tell you that I need no toilet paper for all the shit I give about others’ opinions. It is not worth the trouble.

And what I am really saying with this is that you are not doing anything wrong. You should be happy to have a hobby, that you have something good in your life, something that makes you feel actually ‘alive’.

So…

Should you hide your blog? No, I think you shouldn’t.
Do I hide my blog? Nope, or not intentionally anyways.
Should we share our interests with everyone? Not unless that would make us happy… Would it?

But, don't let me do all the talking. I want to know what you think of this as well.

  • http://crushingcinders.com/ Sue Holmes

    Great post! I had a quiet giggle yesterday when noticed one of my (why do you waste your time on YA books!) friends reading ‘Grave Mercy’ by Robin LaFevers

    • http://www.readingaftermidnight.com/ Ari

      Got the same feeling in these last past weeks when 2 friends of mine were reading both “Daughter of smoke and bone” and the “Lumatere Chroniles” series. I am still not sure why it makes me so happy to see other enjoy the books I enjoy :)

  • Grace

    If I had a blog (let’s say as cool as this one and some others I follow) I would tell that to everyone with no shame. It is not like people that watch movies are ashamed of what they do, so why should bloggers? You people tell us about all these beautiful stories, and we are grateful for that, we are proud of your work. You should be too! ;)

    • http://www.readingaftermidnight.com/ Ari

      I think the same :)
      The only problem I have with this blogging thing is that I don’t have enough time, LOL, but I try my best to keep enjoying it :)

  • http://anniejacksonbooks.com/ Annie

    “The book means more to me probably than they do” I just adore that and also agree :)

    For me, I usually wish more of my friends and family read my blog. But just the ones I really like and care about – not like acquaintances. Because I know they aren’t on twitter and I’m not on Facebook and when they want to know what I’ve been thinking about lately I’m like, It’s all right there… you’re just not reading it. Which is fine because they’re busy or it’s not their form of communication or whatever. I don’t fault them for it I just feel more connected to them when they do read it or comment on a post.

    But then it’s also hard because you’re spot on, they don’t read YA books so they’re wildly not interested :) (I do blog about other things, though). But that’s why I love the book blogging community so much. Even if I didn’t have a blog, I could find all these people who DO like the books I like and we can discuss them and become friends and then that shared interest isn’t as lonely for any of us :)

    • http://www.readingaftermidnight.com/ Ari

      What I like about the community is that you find people that share the same interests as you, and slowly you get to trust their opinions. If they like some books you might be trying them too, because chances are that you will love them.

      This doesn’t happen with my friends though, we like different things and even though some books we like might ‘overlap’, usually that’s not the case. And that’s not a bad thing, I am so over the trying to even make them like the same things, LOL.

      But that’s why i love blogging, that’s why i love goodreads – these are both all about reading, all about what I enjoy reading; I find books I like, talk about them freely with my book-friends, and I don’t feel the need to share these necessarily with my close ones if I think that they won’t be interested. It’s a win-win situation.